WORDS FOR APPROACHING RINGING IN 2013

Have you ever had a surreal moment that is quite uncomfortable but you realize the moment is actually exactly as it should be? I had one of these a couple of weeks ago. Last May, I joined Toastmasters so I could get more comfortable giving presentations and speaking spontaneously to groups. It's been a wonderful experience and I highly recommend it.

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On our regularly weekly meeting at noon a couple of weeks ago, I was scheduled to give my third speech in our Competent Communicator Manual about why anyone should take up writing practice. As I walked toward the meeting place, I noticed several small herds of familiar-looking people and I thought, "Oh yeah, it's probably my former employer's holiday luncheon." It wasn't until I left the stairs up to the second floor that I realized they were having their luncheon at the Toastmasters meeting place. I didn't want to be there. I've heard almost nothing from them (except from one still there and another who since also left), and they told me they would hire me freelance but they never did, without informing me of their change of plans. So, as a whole, I don't have the warmest and fuzziest feelings toward the place.

After managing to avoid most of them and while sitting waiting for the meeting to start, something amazing occurred to me. I was more among true friends who cared about me as a person in my Toastmasters meeting with people I'd seen not even weekly since May than I ever was sitting next door having lunch with people I'd worked with for years. My fellow Toastmasters care more about me, my personal development, and my personal improvement - and do it in a more caring way - than anyone (except perhaps well less than a handful) ever did there.

In all fairness, they or it, my former employer as a whole, are not entirely to blame. I also realized while waiting for the meeting that I never really gave them a reason to care about me as a person, because I didn't really care about them either. I was there to do a job and, back then, I didn't see the advantage of personal relationships. Except for a couple of people who were brave enough and wonderful enough to talk to me first, I never really talked to anyone about myself or themselves. I got to work, hit the ground running, did my job, and I went home. Knowing then what I know now, I still don't think I would participate in chit-chat when there is work to be done, but I think maybe I'd make more of an effort to get to really know more people.

Another thing I've suspected but was firmly cemented in my beliefs while waiting was that my former employer actually did me a favor by doing what they did (or didn't) do. If they'd have done what they said they would do, I would still be stuck back in that life. In a way, they forced me to leap into doing what I've always known deep down in my heart was what I wanted to do, but was too afraid to try to do it: to build a life writing and helping people say what they want to say. Without that push, I would not be who or where I am today. I would still be a robot, not fully realizing and being too timid to follow my passion of writing. So I thank them.

As I think forward to 2013, I can see the clear path my life has followed up to this point. And it feels right; it feels it is as it should be. And I will keep on the path - becoming even more of the real person I am; forming real relationships that will last beyond circumstances; and being at peace with what I'm doing with my life, hopeful, and engaged.

Happy New Year!

From The Wordsy Woman

ADVENTURES IN CREATIVE WRITING - WEEK SIX

The bulk of the Center for Active Seniors, Inc. and Midwest Writing Center series of creative writing classes is over. The first three weeks we covered creative writing basics: getting into a writing practice, types of creative writing, and creative writing elements such as energy, insight, etc.

This past few weeks I enjoyed a nice break while speakers took over for me. December 4th, Lilly Setterdahl, author of sixteen books including two historical novels talked about nonfiction. Lilly shared her fascinating life story of growing up in Sweden after World War II. We learned when writing a memoir, it's helpful to group stories by subject rather than chronologically, include everything you remember, and insert pictures wherever possible. We also learned all of us have interesting stories which can be learned from, even if they are just shared with family members and future generations.

On December 11th, Dick Stahl joined us to talk about poetry. Many of his poems are autobiographical and we were encouraged to look inside ourselves and our own memories for poetry. Dick made experiencing poetry accessible and writing poetry less mythical. He shared many insights into poetry through others' quotes, including Roald Tweet's telling, "What?    Of course." If someone says this after reading a poem, the work has done its job. Dick also used fortune cookies to do a fun poetry prompt with us; I am definitely stealing that idea.

This week, Jon Riplinger, retired English teacher and author of several young adult novels joined us to talk about fiction. Jon shared his journey through finding an agent, getting published, having the agent drop his genre, finding a new agent, finding a new publisher, having the publisher go bankrupt, and finding another publisher. And dozens of revisions. He showed us that novel writing is not an easy or quick process but if you love the process, as he does, it is still worthwhile.

After a holiday break, we'll meet again to talk about editing, revision, and the publication process. I've enjoyed leading the class even more than I thought I would. And along with the attendees, I've immensely enjoyed our guests. I'm looking forward to a new session starting in February and I'm hoping to tweak it enough with more in-class writing that the current participants will be back.

Happy Holidays!

From The Wordsy Woman

CHRISTMAS WORDS ALL YEAR LONG

My husband's and my favorite Christmas movie of all time has to be National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. The movie has a humorous premise that rings true; but what I laugh at the hardest are the words. We quote several parts of the movie the entire year. It's not just the words, though, but the delivery. Because even though we know it so well we could probably recite the entire movie, we still wait in anticipation for those favorite words to come up. And when they do, we laugh hysterically.

And here are our top five favorites:

Just after Cousin Eddie arrives and Clark says, "I couldn't be more surprised if I woke up tomorrow with my head sewed to the carpet."

After Clark crashes into the Walmart, Eddie points and says, "Bingo!"

We crack up at that whole sequence where Clark says if anyone is looking for any last minute Christmas gifts to get him, they could bring his boss so he can "tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is!" but what we quote all year is "Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?"

After the  big blow up and the grandparents are getting ready to leave and Clark says, "Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny f#@%ing Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse."

And, finally, my personal favorite is when Clark says, "Look around you, Ellen! We're at the threshold of hell!"

Happy Holidays!
From The Wordsy Woman

COMMA SUTRA - POSITION THREE

Position Three of the Comma Sutra addresses the commas which should occur between two, three, or more (though I wouldn't recommend too many more) independent clauses in sentences. Usually these independent clauses are connected by and, but, or or one of their siblings of nor, for, so, and yet. Or and nor bring up their own whole other issues - either, or and neither, nor - but that isn't really about commas, so we'll table the discussion for now.

Unless your sentence contains short independent clauses, you should use a comma before the and, etc. (the coordinating conjunctions) to, according to Diana Hacker in A Pocket Style Manual (5th Ed.) "tell readers that one independent clause has come to a close and that another is about to begin" (p. 58). As Ms. Hacker warns, this rule only applies to independent clauses.

Here are a couple of examples from Missing Emily: Croatian Life Letters:

Two short independent clauses where a comma is not necessary:

"I think she likes Mate but I am not worried."

Longer independent clauses with a comma:

"I have not known what I should write to you, but I will try to answer the questions in your last letter."

How do you know if your clauses are independent and whether they are short enough to omit the comma? You guessed it: read the work out loud. Read the clauses as their own sentences - such as "I think she likes Mate," and, "I am not worried." If they make sense as standalone sentences, they are independent. To determine if the length of the clauses requires a comma, read the sentence out loud. If the meaning is clear, you can leave the comma out. If the meaning is confusing or, if by the time you finish the sentence, you are lost and don't remember what the first part of the sentence said, you probably need a comma.

As with Positions One and Two of the Comma Sutra, this one has a degree of ambiguity, and it is open to varying subjective interpretations. What's the bottom line according to the Wordsy Woman? Seek out every coordinating conjunction and multi-clause sentence in your writing and question it. Make an informed, purposeful choice - comma or no comma - and go with it. Others may disagree, but you'll have your thought-out reasons with which to defend yourself.

Source:     Hacker, D. (2009). A Pocket Style Manual, 5th Ed. Bedford/St. Martin's: Boston/New York.

GO FORTH AND EDIT

I'm an obsessive editor. I didn't say I'm a perfect editor; I'm just obsessed about editing. Or more exactly, proofreading. You see, I make a lot of typos. A LOT. Seriously, the best things ever invented were the backspace and delete keys. My typing fingers just have minds of their own - or maybe they are just faster than my brain. They just get going and they get so far ahead that they start to make mistakes, stumbling over each other. I have been able to train them a bit over the years, though. Sometimes they just tap the backspace key before I've even realized I made a mistake.

I suppose the obsession started in college. I learned to proofread everything because a well crafted sentence may just be the one thing that sets you apart and earns you that higher grade. I started proofreading my emails when I started to work as a legal secretary in DeKalb, Illinois. The boss gently suggested one day I might want to proofread my emails before I sent them out. The thought, somehow, had never occurred to me before. This is when email was just getting started. I'd sent handwritten or even typed letters and wouldn't have thought of stamping them and throwing them in the mailbox without reading them first - but email? Go figure. But I did it and I realized, "Wow, I'm a typomaniac." So I started proofreading all of my emails. When I became a paralegal, I continued. In a law firm, the appearance of meticulous accuracy is of utmost importance, so, naturally, you want that to trickle through down to every last email.

So it became a habit. I proofread work emails, home emails, and emails to myself. I'm not saying they never get through without a single mistake but they do get through with a lot less than if I hadn't done that final check. When texting came along, I continued. I proofread every text I send, even to my kids, and even to make sure I have the correct texting shorthand.

The ability to proofread and edit is one of the many things I love about written words. If I only could do it before my mouth opens and I speak, the world would be far better place. So my advice about proofreading is you don't have to be obsessive like me, but when you are communicating in business or with anyone who has any control over your fate, don't skimp on proofreading.

-The Wordsy Woman

Words of Thanks!

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We have just celebrated the day set aside for gratitude. And, of course, turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, and pumpkin pie. But mostly, gratitude. Like others, I am grateful for so many things in my life. As the Wordsy Woman, I'm thankful for the twenty-six letters than can be arranged in a near-infinite number of combinations to make words which can be arranged to create a near-infinite number of sentences which can be arranged to make paragraphs, poems, stories, novels, and an array of messages that can do just about anything. They can make people feel, think, change someone's mind, or convince them to do something. Inspire, comfort, protect, and bring justice.

Words are so little but can do so much. In my opinion, they are the most powerful thing in the world. They connect me to people and provide the source for my passion and purpose in life.

So this year, in addition to all of the usual "I'm thankful for"s like a roof over my head, great kids, good husband, enjoyable family, food to eat, my health, the green grass, and blue sky, I'm going to declare my special gratitude this year for...

Words.

Hope you had a Happy Thanksgiving!

-The Wordsy Woman

ADVENTURES IN CREATIVE WRITING - WEEK ONE

I have to say I think the first week of the CASI (Center for Active Seniors, Inc.) and MWC (Midwest Writing Center) creative writing classes went pretty great. There was just one tense moment when I forgot I'd had my laptop on mute so the audio from my video wasn't coming out of my speakers, but that was about it. Ten people ended up attending the session, a good crowd.

I have to admit, also, that I was nervous. My inner critic, which we talked about, was all over me. She told me I didn't know what I was talking about, that I was not qualified to teach anyone anything, and when she ran out of everything else, she jumped to her go-to critique, "You're a hack." But I followed my own advice and just told her, "Maybe so, but I'm doing it anyway." And I did. And everyone seemed to enjoy it and learn something. And my great lesson for today is: You Tube is a workshop instructor's lifesaver. Showing videos gave me a break from talking, took off some of the pressure of making sure I said everything to say about the topic, and hopefully reinforced my message by showing people saying the same things in different ways.

Today, I tried to help people say what they want to say by getting them in the habit of writing. We talked about what creative writing is and what it isn't. I assured them they all have what takes to write and even if they never do anything with it, it's still a worthwhile endeavor. We talked about carving out the time and space for writing and how to deal with the inner critic. Everyone had great comments and questions. Hopefully they left inspired to write something...anything...and to return next week. We'll be talking about idea generation, prompts, free writing, and introducing the various creative writing types.

Until then... Happy Writing!!!

The Wordsy Woman

HELPING OTHERS SAY WHAT THEY WANT TO SAY

On Tuesday, November 13th, I will embark on a project to directly practice the "helping people say what they want to say" part of my mission. I've volunteered to lead a seven session workshop series about creative writing for members of Center for Active Seniors, Inc. (CASI). It is a partnership between CASI and the Midwest Writing Center (MWC). A CASI member who I know through MWC came up with the idea after interacting with fellow-CASI members dealing with the loss of a spouse or other issues. He thought, as it had him, it might help them to write about it and perhaps seeing their words in a publication might help them as well.

I was excited to help so we met with CASI and decided to put together the program: two seven-week sessions, one this fall and one next spring, leading to anthology publication early next summer. I would teach the first three sessions about creative writing basics; invite guest speakers for fiction, poetry, and nonfiction; and then end with a summary session also focusing on revision and editing in preparation for putting together the anthology.

I am excited about the project and a little nervous, as I usually am when taking on new projects. Will I measure up? Will they believe I know what I'm talking about? Will they be bored? Will they think I'm a hack? And the list goes on and on. This is my "self confidence problem" peeking its ugly head into my sense of excitement. To combat it, I've re-studied my writing books and put together a slide presentation complete with you-tube videos to reinforce what I'm saying. At the least, I hope I can share my passion for writing by telling them what I've learned about the process over the years. At the most, I hope that by inspiring them to get into creative writing and giving them some ideas about how to do it, I will help them say what they want to say.

I also hope over the next seven weeks, I'll get some interesting material I can share here on this blog.

-The Wordsy Woman

WHAT WORDS GET YOUR VOTE?

If you are eighteen or older and a United States citizen, you will or should be headed to the polls this coming Tuesday to cast your vote for our next President, Vice-President, and a whole roster of other elected officials – unless, of course, you are like me and took advantage of early or absentee voting.

In large part, you have or will place your vote based on words. Words spoken or written by the candidates themselves, political action committees, or friends and in or on newspapers, billboards, lawn signs, television commercials, candidate appearances, on expensive glossy snail mailed cards, or one or more of the thirteen thousand twenty-six telephone calls you’ve received over the past several weeks.

It doesn’t matter who you like better – or, more accurately, who you dislike less – or with which party your beliefs generally align, you can probably agree that political candidates, as a whole, tend to do unspeakable things with words. They twist them. They make them up. The fling them like flaming sacks of you-know-what. Sometimes they’re true. Sometimes they’re not. Sometimes they’re recorded secretly. And sometimes they are spliced together in a masterpiece of video manipulation.

So how do you know what to believe? I don’t know the answer. But here are two things I do with all those political words:

1.            Consider the source of the words. I’m more inclined to believe those “I’m so-and-so and I approve this message” words than those where that affirmation is missing. For some candidates, it seems that they don’t even produce their own commercials – they just rely on or are victims of these other groups’ apparently astronomical marketing budgets.

2.            Listen to every single word. What are they really saying? But more important, what are they not saying? Those marketing message copywriters are very crafty – they choose each word carefully so if it seems they’ve left something out, chances are it was on purpose and not just an oversight. Ask yourself, "Why?"

Whether you are a Donkey or an Elephant and whether you are empowered by or view that label as an insult or associate yourself with a whole other “animal” altogether, happy voting.

-From the Wordsy Woman

THE WORDS OF OUR MOTHERS

“Be careful.” These are the words I’ve heard every time my mother and I have separated every since I can remember. It’s good advice. Short. To the point. Broad and easy to remember. And it works for everything. Driving a car, dating, swimming, having children, taking a bath. 

Recently, I took a shopping trip with my mom, my daughter, and my daughter’s friend. My mom and I were talking about the trip I’m planning to take with my daughter’s choir in the spring to New York City. She wisely advised me to take plenty of underwear because at that time of year, you never know when a nor-easter blizzard will pop up and you will be stuck. Also, you can wear your clothes more than once but you want to change your underwear.

Don’t get me wrong, this is very, very good advice. However, since I’m knocking on the door of that last birthday before forty, I thought it was kind of funny. 

My mom has had great advice for me on many occasions. My all time favorite has to be her advice to make sure my skirt was not stuck in my underwear (or something like that) when I was on my way to accept a financial scholarship for college during the end of my senior year of high school. To others, it may seem like odd advice, but to me who had actually had my skirt stuck in my underwear after using the restroom on a homecoming date and was lucky enough to have my mother see this and rescue me, there could not have been better words for the occasion.

So now I am the mother of a fourteen and a half year old daughter who responds with a dramatic eye roll just about every time I pass on my sage, motherly words of advice. I don’t recall if I rolled my eyes at my mom when I was a teenager – I’m sure I did, though, even if I wasn’t bold enough to do it “out loud” and just in my head. Anyway, I think my daughter would be well advised to not bother with the eye roll because when she’s knocking on forty, I’m sure I’ll still be passing my words on to her.

Thanks, mom, for all of the great words of advice.

-The Wordsy Woman

COMMA SUTRA - POSITION TWO

The comma so perplexes me that I haven't felt up to tackling position two of the comma sutra since the post about using commas in lists several weeks ago. So today I tackle the intuitive comma. The one you really can only know is missing by reading your words out loud. I know, I know - reading out loud is a pain in the backside and embarrassing, especially if your kids have their friends over, but it is mandatory to find proper comma placement.

I'll use a couple of examples from my new book, Missing Emily: Croatian Life Letters, of how something might have made no sense if I had left the comma out.

Page One:

If I hadn't used a comma:

"Always full of unwelcome surprises Dad changed these plans."

Now, when you read it silently, you might not notice anything, but read it aloud and your speaking voice triggers your brain into questioning if Dad was the unwelcome surprise or if Dad delivered the unwelcome surprise? Change it to "Always full of unwelcome surprises, Dad changed these plans," and it makes sense. It says what you (or I in this case) want it to say.

One more example from Missing Emily:

Page 87:

Without the comma:

"I peeked around the corner and saw them crouched down their mouths tucked into the tops of their pajamas giggling."

How did they crouch down into their own mouths? Were their pajamas giggling? The correct way to (and the way I did) write it is "I peeked around the corner and saw them crouched down, their mouths tucked into the tops of their pajamas, giggling."

Position two of the comma sutra is difficult because there are no hard and fast rules. The only way to decide on the appropriate location is to read the words out loud, or at the least deliberately, carefully, and slowly.

Look forward to Comma Sutra - Position Three at some point when I can muster up the energy to tackle it.

Until then, happy writing!
From the Wordsy Woman

DO YOU KNOW WHETHER THERE WILL BE STORMY WEATHER?

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I have a problem. A finger problem. You see, my brain knows the correct words to use in certain situations but my fingers persist in insisting to type the wrong ones. One of these situations is whether to use weather or whether. Now, I know that weather is the word for all of that stuff that comes out of or happens to be in the sky. Cloudy. Sunny. Rainy. Stormy. But for some reason, every once in awhile when I am re-reading something I've written, I come across weather when I meant to write whether (and sometimes even wheather!!!). So, essentially, this blog post is an attempt to train my fingers.

Whether is appropriate when you are writing about two things; whether you want to chose one or the other. Will the weather be stormy? Or will it be not stormy? Whether there will be stormy weather. To be more precise, according to Dictionary.com, whether is "used to introduce a single alternative, the other being implied or understood, or some clause or element not involving alternatives" as in I don't know whether to take a raincoat (or not) to deal with today's weather.

Conversely, the specific definition of weather according to Dictionary.com is "the state of the atmosphere with respect to wind, temperature, cloudiness, moisture, pressure, etc." or "a strong wind or storm or strong winds and storms collectively." 

Really, for me anyway, it is not that I get confused on whether to use weather or whether, it is the fact that my typing fingers refuse to cooperate! I hope yours - and from now on mine - will behave better.

-The Wordsy Woman

SHOOTING BULLETS - POWERPOINT TIP

My rule of thumb when creating a slide show or Power Point presentation is you can't go wrong with bullet points; lists of information set off by dots, dashes, check marks, or other small, simple graphics. If you are giving an oral presentation, your slide show should only enhance it. It should not be able to replace your presentation. If that is the case, just run the slide show as a movie. The slides should add interest to your presentation and draw attention to key points.

When putting together a slide show to accompany an oral presentation, I think of myself being in the audience. What would I want to see? What would bore me? What should I remember as the most important points? Then I design the slides around that. Including too many complete sentences (or even too many words, period) on a slide will distract the audience from the message. They will be so busy reading the slide, they won't hear what you are saying. A few to handful of bullet points with words or short phrases next to them key audience members into the most important points of your talk. They highlight your talk and provide a visual cue or reminder to help them remember what you say.

Words or phrases placed in bullet points work even better if you have pictures or other graphics to go along with them. Graphics make the presentation more interesting; audience members won't get bored looking at slide after slide of just words. If possible, run through the slides on the projector you will actually be using for your presentation to make sure your font is big enough and shows up (avoid light colors) and that any graphics you use will be clear.

Power Point presentations or slides can be great assets to any oral presentation; they can help keep the audience engaged, help them remember your key talking points, and provide them with an overall enjoyable experience. However, they must be used correctly to avoid the risk of boring the audience, overwhelming them, or detracting from your message.

Happy speaking and thanks for reading!
-The Wordsy Woman

MY NEW PUBLISHED WORDS

Even though my "official" launch date will not be until November 24th when I'll be physically selling, signing, and reading from Missing Emily: Croatian Life Letters at an event for Midwest Writing Center at Southpark Mall in Moline, Illinois, I'm excited to announce the book is now for sale at Amazon.com. As everything gets uploaded, it will be for sale at other online sites as well. And as I pound the pavement, hopefully, it will be for sale at more and more stores in the Quad Cities USA area.

I started thinking about this book about four years ago when Biljana came to work at the same law firm where I was then-employed. I began researching and outlining about a year later. The rough draft was completed about a year and a half ago. And then rounds and rounds and rounds of revisions and editing before starting publication late last spring.

MissingEmily: Croatian Life Letters is the story about how two teenage girls living on opposite sides of the world, one in the United States and one in Croatia, who are dealing with their own turmoil, one of deep depression and one of civil war, find comfort and solace by writing letters to each other in the early 1990s.

The format of the book combining narrative with letters is different from many books and I am not aware of any book which links someone from the United States with someone from Croatia. It is historical in that it covers historical events, namely Croatia’s civil war, but it is was only 20 plus years ago which is part of the point of the story – civil wars or historical events are occurring right now. The book is also different in that it doesn’t neatly fit into its young adult genre; one of the characters is approximately fifteen to sixteen during the story and one thirteen to fourteen which put them into the traditional category of young adult and middle grade, respectively. The subject matter, however, would be categorized more as older young adult by traditional publishers. This is also part of the point of the story – death, depression, and war don’t fit into neat little packages, either. They are messy and sometimes ambiguous. Thus, part of the target market for the book is other adults, like me, who enjoy reading YA books.

To read an excerpt, click here to access the Look Inside feature on Amazon. If you review books for a blog, magazine, e-zine, newspaper (print or web), or other online or print publication and would like a free review copy, please send an email to me at jodie@wordsywoman.com with your name, publication name and URL (if any), physical address, email address and phone number and indicate if you want a paperback or e-book.

Thanks and happy reading!

The Wordsy Woman

MY STATIONERY IS STATIONARY

One little letter that does so much! Here, switch E for A or vice-versa, and you've got two totally different things. The one with an E, stationery, is the paper or other materials used to write letters including not only the paper but envelopes, pencil, and pens. (See Dictionary.com's definition by clicking here.)

On the other hand, stationary, means something quite different and unrelated to letter-writing. Stationary refers more to a speed or spatial position. According to Dictionary.com, to be stationary means to not be moving, to be standing still, unmovable, or remaining in the same condition. (Click here for Dictionary.com definition.)

There is really no easy way - that I can think of anyway - to keep the two straight other than to remember the writing tools are spelled with an E and the others with an A. If you can't remember, just flip-flop them and you'll get half of them right.

Just kidding ... don't do that. Get a dictionary or go to Dictionary.com and look it up to be sure.

Happy "grammaring" from the Wordsy Woman

MY INSPIRATIONAL WORDS

I think music inspires almost everyone in some way at some point. Some people are inspired by religious songs, some classical music, and some hard rock. My top inspiring words come in a variety of songs. I play them to give me that push to get through a tough day or they comfort me by letting me know someone understands. In a way, like my mission as The Wordsy Woman to help people say what they want to say, my inspirational songs help put into words what I feel but do not know how to say.

Here are my top ten musical inspirational words. Maybe some of yours are the same?

The Calling by Mary Chapin Carpenter

Don’t Stop by Fleetwood Mac

Follow Your Dreams by Poco

I’m Gonna Be Somebody by Travis Tritt

I Got A Name by Jim Croce

The River by Garth Brooks

Something More by Sugarland

St. Elmo’s Fire (Man In Motion) by John Parr

Stand Back Up by Sugarland

Untasted Honey by Kathy Mattea

LIES, LIES, ALL LIES -- OR IS IT LAYS?

Preliminary Draft Cover

I'm in the middle of doing my final proof of Missing Emily: Croatian Life Letters and had the hardest time with the words lie, lay, and all of their counterparts. To address this problem, I avoided using the word wherever possible such as in "curled on the floor" or "she was perpendicular on the bed." But sometimes, I just couldn't avoid it. So I got out my handy A Pocket Style Manual, 5th Ed., by Diana Hacker.

Every time I came across some derivative of lie or lay, I had to think critically about what I was trying to say. Was I trying to say to "recline or rest on a surface" as defined by Hacker in A Pocket Style Manual in which case a form of lie was appropriate (p.26)? Or was I trying to put something or someone in a place in which case lay would be correct?

And it gets even more confusing. After I figured out which of lie or lay was appropriate, I had to figure out which word was correct for the tense I was using. If the correct word was a form of lie, then the correct past tense word was lay (yes, the same as the root word for place/put something) and the present participle was lying as in "is lying down" which is the same as if someone is being untruthful. The past participle of lie is lain which I avoided totally. For lay, past tense and past participle is laid while the present participle is laying as in "she is laying the book in the trash."

Even after all of the studying I did comparing my lays or lies to the guidelines in A Pocket Style Manual, all of these lies, lays, laids, lains, lyings, and layings are swimming around in my head. So it doesn't look like I'll be able to turn my page away from this section any time soon. I just hope I made the right choices in my proof.

by The Wordsy Woman

Source: Hacker, Diane (2009). A Pocket Style Manual (5th ed.). Boston/New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.

COMMA SUTRA – POSITION ONE

The comma so perplexes me in writing that I think a whole book could be written on the topic. It is used in so many different ways and its usage is different depending on what you are writing and what you intend to say. I’ve gone from being a comma-abuser to a comma-avoider to everywhere in between.

Because of the complexity, I will concentrate on comma usage in a particular minute instance, and maybe one day, I’ll have it mastered. This week – the list.

I grew up hearing you always use a comma between the second to last item in a list with three or more items and the conjunction (“and” or “or”) appearing before the last item in the list (unless, of course, a semi-colon is appropriate which is a whole other topic). Then when I became a paralegal, I was told this was wrong – you should leave out that comma. And then I read somewhere you should use the comma when writing lists in fiction but you should leave them out when writing non-fiction. Even last week when reading a Harvard Business School case for a class, I noticed there were no commas between the last two items in lists in the text - "proving" the fiction vs. non-fiction distinction.

To solve this confusion, I turn to the “experts.” According to A Pocket Style Manual, Fifth Edition, on page 58, by Diana Hacker, you should follow the advice I received in grade school of “use a comma between all items in a series of at least three, including the last two.” Hacker acknowledges the paralegal no-last-comma camp but indicates “most experts advise using [the comma] because its omission can result in ambiguity or misreading.”

According to The Associated Press AP Stylebook and Briefing on Media Law, 2009 Edition, you “do not put a comma before the conjunction in a simple series” which appears to consist of three similar items (p. 355). The Essentials of English, 6^th Edition, by Vincent F. Hopper, Cedric Gale, Ronald C. Foote, and Benjamin W. Griffith appear to agree with Diana Hacker though it does admit it is “not absolutely essential” (p. 114). The Publication Manual of the American Psychological Association, Sixth Edition, also agrees with the comma-always mantra (p. 88).

So what will the Wordsy Woman do? Well, unless someone asks me specifically to leave it out, I will insert a comma between the second-to-last item and the “and” or “or” in my list of three items or more.

PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES

If you are a small business owner or small proprietor or freelancer trying to decide what words you should use to promote or market your business, change your shoes. Rather than being the service or product provider, put yourself in the role of customer. Visit an independent bookstore, buy a cake from a local bakery, hire a contractor, or find a real job or product you need which you may normally take care of on your own but hire it done or buy it somewhere else. And then use what you learn in your promotion and marketing.

In addition to the obvious of paying attention to how your competitor actually performs the work or to the quality and price of his or her product, concentrate on the whole process. How were you treated? How did you feel? What bugged you about the process? Was there not enough communication or too much? What made you a little nervous? What were your biggest concerns – that it be done on time, that the price was right, or that the quality was good enough? Would you have liked more personal advice or connection? What satisfied you? What could have been done better?

Use your observations and answers to these questions to amp up your competitive advantage. Can you incorporate any positive aspects of the experience into your own way of doing business? Avoid repeating the negative aspects of the experience in your own business dealings. For example, did you wish you would’ve received more status updates on work progress? If so, make sure you are providing adequate updates to your customers. If you’re not sure how many updates your customers want, ask them. After all, meeting customer needs is one of the objectives of doing business under the goal umbrella of making a profit.

Want more Wordsy Woman tips about marketing, click here and request my free publication, 10 Tips for Reaching Today's Consumers.

MANUAL MAP APP

A couple of weeks ago, I visited the historical museum in Humboldt, Iowa, and found this unfamiliar configuration of lines and words on the blackboard in the old school. Now, I don't know if this was not taught to me in school or if perhaps I was sick that day because although I didn't remember it, my kids and my husband did.

According to this website sponsored by the  Capital Community College Foundation, sentence diagrams are depicted here. Since the device hasn't been used for thirty years, it is possible it was not taught in my English classes. Diagramming sentences was developed over 100 years ago by Alonzo Reed and Brainerd Kellogg; it is a way of visually breaking down sentences. Fascinating!

I won't try to explain it here for fear of totally slaughtering it, but, basically, you write the main words in the sentence like the subjects and verbs on horizontal lines and then you use connecting slashes to write your modifiers like adjectives and adverbs. For an explanation of the basics, visit this website; for instructions on how to diagram compound sentences, visit this one.

I'm thinking this might be a good technique to use when editing as the Wordsy Woman. It may help in boiling down sentences for tightness and logic. Happy mapping!

P.S. If you are a history buff, the museum has a ton of artifacts and architecture, especially for such a small town. Plus, since it is not crowded, you get a personal tour! Plan to spend at least two to three hours.

IT'S YOUR CALL...

Your and you're are cousins to the previously blogged-about its and it's. To decide which is appropriate in your sentence, follow the same advice. Read your sentence substituting you are for you're; if it sounds right, you're is the correct word. You're is the contraction for you are.

According to Dictionary.com, your shows a possession owned or possessed by you, one, or, informally, all members of a group as in your clothes, your best best, or take your average Joe, for example.

If you are doesn't make sense in your sentence, your is your best bet.

Now you're a former you're misuser from yore.

And just in case you're tempted, yur is just a text-message abbreviation and is never appropriate in prose.

ORDER MATTERS

I drove by a sign on the wall on the side of a bar a couple of weeks ago and, unfortunately, I didn't have time to snap a picture. Here is what the sign said:

"Have a beer and stop in."

Hmmm... Does that mean I should have a beer before I come to the bar? Isn't that why they'd want me to stop in the first place - to buy a beer?

I think they meant "Stop in and have a beer." The moral of the story? Sometimes order matters. Make sure you are not telling people to do the opposite of what you actually want them to do. Click here to see another similar blog post on this topic.

By: The Wordsy Woman

THE WORD BATTLES - ITS vs. IT'S

A little bit easier to deal with than the triple threat of they're, there, and their are several two-word conundrums. Today, we'll talk about its vs. it's.

It's is the contraction for it is or it has. To test to see if it's is correct, read your sentence substituting it is or it has for it's. If it sounds right, it is. Keep it's.

Its, however, is a pronoun and signifies possession; it owns something. If it is or it has doesn't make sense, chances are you want to use its. To confirm this, think about whether your sentence is talking about something belonging to it or owned by it. If it does, its is correct.

For more information, see Dictionary.com's definition of its and its discussion of how it's confused with it's.

THEY'RE OVER THERE WITH THEIR WARES - The Triple Threat

One of the biggest writing errors one can make and one of the easiest to correct is the proper usage of the words they're, there, and their. Even though I know how to use these words properly, mistakes still show up in my writing. Apparently my typing fingers have minds of their own...

An easy way to correct these mistakes in Microsoft Word is through a "Find" search. In Word 2007, it is on the "Home" tab under "Editing" - to the far right on my computer. Search each of they're, their, and there separately to double check if the correct word was used. If you can't tell, try these tricks.

They're is the contraction for they are so read the sentence substituting they are for they're; if it sounds right, keep they're. If it doesn't, try there or their.

Their shows possession for the group they or them. If your sentence is describing something owned by they or them (like their wares), then their is correct.

There is a little bit trickier. According to Dictionary.com, there can mean “in or at that place; at that point in an action, speech, etc.; in that matter, particular, or respect; into or to that place; or used by way of calling attention to something or someone.” In my mind, there refers to a place or location but not necessarily a physical location. If the sentence isn't talking about possession and they are doesn't make sense, chances are you want there. To triple-check, decide if the Dictionary.com explanation applies. 

Happy their, they're, and there hunting!

I ACCEPT THE EXCEPTION or DO I TAKE EXCEPTION TO YOUR ACCEPTING?

A couple of months ago I saw a story on the ten o'clock news about private social clubs in our area. It was a continuing story so they showed the same video over several nights: a sign on one of the club's doors that said, "Donation Excepted."

According to Dictionary.com, "Excepted" means excluded or left out...

What I think the club probably meant to say was "Donations Accepted."

According to Dictionary.com, "Accepted" means "generally approved" or "usually regarded as normal, right, etc."

The moral of the story? Make sure you use the correct word or you just may actually discourage people from doing what you want them to do.

A CHUCKLE ON A HOT DAY

At least a year or a couple of years ago now, I don't remember where we were, what we are doing, or what show it was on, but my kids and I saw one of those funny-picture or funny-ad segments about this furniture company called "Sofa King." It showed an ad that said something like "Shop Sofa King where the prices are Sofa King low." (A Google search shows a lot of people have jumped onto the "Sofa King" bandwagon.)

Of course, my kids (and I'll admit it, me) thought this was hilarious. And, of course, they tried to use it as a way to say the f-word without actually saying the f-word. After our initial giggles wore off, my husband and I banned the "Sofa King" proclamations. But, even so long after the initial appearance of this phrase, it comes up every now and then. And it is still as funny as it ever was.

For the past week or so, our temperatures here have been hovering around the 100 degree mark with heat indexes well above that. I cannot even count the number of times I've thought, "It is Sofa King hot!" And then I had a little chuck and it made me feel a bit better. Go ahead, give it a try!

The moral of the story: Say your written words out loud to make sure they sound like you want them to sound.

From: The Wordsy Woman

SHE'S HERE!!

The transition is complete. You can call me "Wordsy!" Wordsy Woman Word Sales and Service rolled out yesterday at Midwest Writing Center's David R. Collins Writers' Conference Book Fair. I saw some current (not old) friends, met some new friends, and talked with a lot of great people.

If you didn't get a chance to come out to the book fair (or weren't around the Quad Cities USA so you could) and missed out on my freebies, you're not totally out of luck. To get a copy of my brochure, "The Wordsy Woman's Creative Writing Quick-Start Guide: Get from wisher to writer right out of the box!", send me an email at jodie@wordsywoman.com; I'll reply with an address to send a SASE (that's a self-address stamped envelope in the writing world) so I can send you one. If you want to save postage and prefer a PDF, let me know that in your email.

Happy July! More "wordsy" posts to come.

All by best,
Wordsy

ONE WEEK TO GO!

The "big launch" of Wordsy Woman Word Sales and Service is just one week away. I will be at the Midwest Writing Center's David R. Collins Writers' Conference Book Fair next Saturday, June 30th, at Rogalski Center on the St. Ambrose University campus in Davenport, Iowa, from 10 a.m. until 3 p.m. I'll have a nearly life-size cut out of the Wordsy Woman on display, brochures, and other freebies.

If you don't come to see the Wordsy Woman or take a look at my book, Crush and Other Love Poems for Girls, then check out books from the other some thirty local authors in attendance. Or come for one of the fun, free children's activities from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. OR come hear some of the readers scheduled.

Click here for more information. Hope to see you there!

TRANSITION ALMOST COMPLETE

Lots of good news this week!

The new website is up, finished, and functional! The MWC Press and 918 Studio Creative Writing Primer, to which I contributed two essays, is up for sale through Midwest Writing Center and as an immediate download for the Kindle/Kindle app.

The official launch of Wordsy Woman will take place on Saturday, June 30, 2012, from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. at the David R. Collins Writers' Conference Book Fair at the Rogalski Center on the St. Ambrose University campus located at 518 West Locust Street in Davenport, Iowa. I will be signing and selling copies of Crush and Other Love Poems for Girls (which is also available for Kindle) and celebrating my new identity as the Wordsy Woman. I'll have brochures, cards, and other swag to handout to celebrate The Wordsy Woman Word Sales and Service.

Regular posts about interesting Wordsy topics will start shortly after the Book Fair. Stay tuned!

MY NEW PUBLISHED WORDS!

The Midwest Writing Center and 918 Studio teamed up to publish MWC Press' first ebook. "The Creative Writing Primer" is a collaboration of essays about various aspects of creative writing, including by yours truly. I have two entries in the work: "Writing as Creative Practice" and "Techniques in Poetry."

Midwest Writing Center is a non-profit organization which is dear to my heart. Its sole mission is "fostering appreciation of the written word, supporting and educating its creators." MWC has helped me immensely as a writer from learning opportunities to helping other writers to organizing events to building my portfolio.

"The Creative Writing Primer" ebook is available in Kindle, iPad,and Nook formats for a steal at $1.99. The entire profit, which amounts to roughly $1.65 after PayPal fees, directly benefits MWC, allowing them to further their mission and provide all of their services and events for writers and readers.

Click here for more information on the ebook and to order.

Click here to learn about MWC in general.

KEEPIN' ON!

Moving forward with my transformation into the Wordsy Woman. New brochures and business cards are ordered. Still working on the website. My plan is to start posting more interesting posts about the power and humor of words in the coming few weeks!

NEW LOGO IS HERE!

The re-branding is underway. I now have a new logo, thanks to Lauren Nigri! I've got my web-hosting and email up (jodie@wordsywoman.com) and have started working on my website design, business cards, brochures and other collateral. I hope to be fully transitioned complete with regular blog posts here by the end of June.

Remember, if you need some new words or your words need repair, "Get that Wordsy Woman!"

For more information in the mean time, click here to see my current website, jodiet.com.

GETTING STARTED

This blog will one day be associated with the re-branding of my current business, Jodie Toohey Writing Innovations, into "Wordsy Woman Writing and Editing". When anyone needs a writer or editor/proofreader of words for anything, I want them to think, "Get that wordsy woman!" For now, I'll use this blog to share updates on my re-branding process and share some some good "words". Here is a real sign I personally saw and took a picture of at a mall in Iowa. I don't know if the creator of the sign did this on person but this is what it REALLY said.